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Year: 2016 (page 2 of 4)

Why a Handkerchief? #36

Why carry a handkerchief? Reason No. 36: You may have to dry your bleacher seat.

Enterprise comes through with a Chrysler 300

As I flew myself into New Century Air Center at Gardener, Kansas for work, I was dismayed to find that the the FBO (airplane service station) had shut down early. My rental car was sitting there in the parking lot and I couldn’t get the keys.  You knew I was flying in. You should’ve stayed open at least till the normal closing time. New Century Air Service loses two stars.

A few phone calls later I was connected to the other FBO where a nice man was willing to come pick me up and rent me their car.  The problem – it was a much more expensive car, a Chrysler 300, and I’d have to return it to a building 3 miles from where my airplane sat.  Well, I figured I’d drive back Monday after work and make the swap to save cash and a Thursday hassle.  But Monday morning I received a call from Dave at Enterprise  and he told me not to worry about it. Keep the Chrysler, return it where your airplane sits, and I’ll charge you the same as the Kia you were supposed to have.  Enterprise gets a star.

Now we address the Chrysler 300.  This was a nice ride with plenty of power, good handling, and a refined interior.  The Alpine branded stereo, however, is weak, and can’t touch the Rockford Fosgate branded stereo in my Nissan.  Chrysler neither loses nor gains stars.

Why a Pocketknife? #16

Why carry a pocketknife? Reason No. 16: You can use to carve pumpkins. Don’t use it for the big cuts because that could break it.  Use it for the detail work.

Why a Pocketknife? #17

Why a pocketknife? #17 If you never buy lottery tickets and think they’re stupid, yet someone gives you one, it’s o.k. to scratch it off.

Why a Handkerchief? #37

Why carry a handkerchief?  Reason No. 37 – Your Culver’s concrete shake might get overfilled.

Why a Handkerchief? #38

Why a hanky? No. 38: Meet at a table out in the warehouse and you’ll find a thick layer of dust. You should clean your hands afterwards.

Why a Pocketknife? #18

Why carry a pocketknife? Reason No. 18.  If you want a slice of delicious cheese, you’re going to have slice open the package, and then slice the cheese.

Why a Pocketknife? #19

Why carry a pocketknife? Reason No. 19: Popcorn, whether packaged in a bag or a bottle, will require a sharp instrument to open.

Why a Pocketknife? #20

Why carry a pocketknife? Reason No. 20: You may need to snip your curtains so they can fit over the brackets and look right.

Why a Handkerchief? #39

Why a hanky? #39: Follow the example of Robert De Niro.  In The Intern, he lent one twice – to dry tears and wipe away puke.

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