Merry Christmas


We have had enough of hearing about “holiday lights,” “holiday shopping,” “holiday songs,” and the “holiday season” that we shall have to introduce a negative post here.  Now you know we are not a negative person, so really this will just be a bit of thinly disguised levity.  We recently discussed with a friend what the worst Christmas songs of all time were and concluded that a top five list was in order.  The criteria: A nationally popular song; as written, not as covered; although a particularly bad or good cover might tip the scales one way or the other; a cover is eligible for dishonorable mention. So here they are, our top five worst Christmas songs of all time:

1. Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas-time
2. So This is Christmas (War is Over)
3. Little Saint Nick
4. Grandma Got Run over by a Reindeer
5. Santa Baby

Dishonorable Mention:

  • Dominick the Italian Christmas Donkey
  • Santa Claus Is Coming to Town (Bruce Springsteen)
  • Do You Hear What I Hear?

Do you have a Christmas song to nominate?  Nominations will almost certainly make dishonorable mention.

2 thoughts on “Merry Christmas

  1. Good grief, “Santa Baby” fills me with the very opposite of yuletide cheer EVERY TIME I hear it. As much as I can help it, the song never gets past the first two words before it’s switched off.

    Other songs for consideration:

    • “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” by Frank Loesser — 1930s pop standard that has improved neither with age nor after numerous awful cover versions
    • “All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth” by Donald Yetter Gardner — not endearing in any way
    • “Same Old Lang Syne” by Dan Fogelberg — awesomely bad, nearly a parody of itself, and sort of a guilty pleasure (truly terrible, but makes me laugh every time I hear it)

    Admittedly, I’ve come to enjoy “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas-time” with all of its saccharine, banal lightheartedness and ridiculous laser-synth…another guilty pleasure, I suppose.

  2. I’ll give dishonorable mentions to all three. “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” makes the list at #6 since it was also nominated by JL.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *